Since you asked ...
My 18-year-old is leaving home for school in another state this year. Faith has been important in our family, but I read that lots of teens fall away from the church when they leave home. What advice could I give her about how to hold on to her Catholic faith now that she is on her own?
This month with Fr. Joe Vetter
Parents have reason for concern when their children leave home for college. Young people face real challenges. They leave the security of home and family and may find themselves among people with differing values and life-experience. The culture of many universities is very open. Professors challenge students to explore new ideas and to stretch the boundaries of their thinking. Many colleges are very secular, with little regard for religion. Even on the best campuses there can be tension between faith and reason.
College can be a very competitive environment, where pressure to succeed is not limited to the classroom. Young people are being evaluated constantly by their peers as well as by their professors. They worry about being physically attractive, athletic, and popular. People under stress seek relief, and sometimes make poor choices about how to find that relief. Groupthink can sometimes overshadow reason as young people release their pent-up energies.
Being a person of faith does not imply that one does not have questions. Young people in particular are inquisitive. The Catholic Church has a long tradition of exploring questions of faith and values. Even when a young person has the benefit of a Catholic elementary and high school education, college can be a challenge. College students ask deeper questions than high school students. Answers that satisfied a 15 year old may not be adequate for someone who is 20.
Some parents feel it is natural for young people to drift from their faith, so don’t worry about it because they are confident their daughter or son will return to church when he or she gets older. Studies do not support this belief. Only about one-third of people who stop practicing their faith during college years return to the church later.
Catholic colleges can provide an environment where the Catholic faith is nurtured. But Catholic colleges are not an option for everyone because of cost, ability to get in, or the course of study one wishes to pursue. Sometimes young people resist the Catholic environment and want broader experience to help them explore questions of faith and life.
The Catholic Church is beginning to recognize the need to provide stronger outreach to support young people on college campuses. Twenty eight percent of college students in the U.S. are Catholic. About 500,000 Catholic students are enrolled in Catholic colleges. About 4.1 million Catholic students study at colleges and universities not sponsored by the Catholic Church. Studies indicate that 80% of Catholic students who participate in Catholic campus ministry programs continue to attend Sunday Mass at least once a month after graduation. Perhaps more important are statistics that indicate that Catholics who are involved in campus ministry are more likely to continue to explore questions of faith after college. Young adults active in campus ministry are more inclined to ask deeper questions about their vocation than those who choose a more secular path.
Students involved in Catholic campus ministry programs find a home and an anchor in the campus Catholic community. They discover peers who share their values, who pursue important questions together. They find friends who will pray with and for them and support them in their concerns.
So, my advice is to recommend that your son or daughter seek out the Catholic campus ministry program at his or her college. Develop friendships with other Catholics, while still reaching out beyond their comfort zone. I do not recommend that involvement with the Catholic community on campus be one’s only engagement. That would defeat the benefits of living in a diverse community. But belonging to a community of faith provides an important anchor for a young person…or for any of us.
A listing of Catholic campus ministries can be found at: www.cbservices.org/ccma.nsf/CampusSites
Father Joe Vetter is Catholic campus minister at Duke University and Director of Campus Ministry for the Diocese of Raleigh.