Love Is Patient
Love is patient; love is kind. Love is not jealous...it is not prone to anger; neither does it brood over injuries...There is no limit to love’s forbearance, to its trust, its hope, its power to endure. Love never fails (1 Corinthians 13:4-8).
We focus this month on another fruit of the Holy Spirit: patience. As Saint Paul reminds us, this gift is rooted in love. If we truly love ourselves and one another as the Lord teaches, patience will be reflected in all that we say and do.
Often when we hear the word patience, we think of the need to exercise this virtue in our relationships with others. Yet, we cannot do so unless we are first patient with ourselves. When we come to acknowledge our failures and limitations; when we recognize that we keep repeating the same mistakes and when we realize the many things we have failed to accomplish, we can so easily lose patience with ourselves, even to the point of embracing an attitude of defeat.
Thus, Saint Francis DeSales tells us to “have patience with all things but chiefly have patience with yourself. Do not lose courage in considering your own imperfections, but instantly set about remedying them—every day begin the task anew.” His sound wisdom reminds us that our growth in holiness is ongoing, a daily process. It is not dependent merely upon our determination, efforts and will-power, but rather on the grace of God who forgives us; strengthens us and raises us to new life.
If we are experiencing a lack of patience with ourselves, maybe we have relied too much on ourselves and too little on the Lord’s divine assistance. In order for us to be patient with ourselves we must entrust each and every day -- and our very lives -- to the Lord so that with His grace we may grow in holiness and perfection. Perhaps this prayer of Saint Teresa of Jesus will assist us: “Let nothing trouble you/ Let nothing frighten you / Everything passes / God never changes / Patience / Obtains all / Whoever has God / Wants for nothing / God alone is enough.
Our love for one another must reflect patience in all our dealings with others. At times, we may find it easier to be patient with a stranger than with those closest to us, including our spouses, children, parents and other family members. Again, we need the grace of God so that we see one another as He sees us, forgive one another as He forgives us and love one another as He loves us.
If we live in such a way, our patience will be reflected in the way we speak to one another, in the encouragement we offer and in the opportunities we give one another to begin anew. Such patience will create a distinct atmosphere of love within our homes and circle of friends. Then, those we love will be at ease. They will not be fearful of disappointing us. They will not be on edge in our company. They will not be afraid to be themselves. They will know they are loved and accepted, even in the midst of their mistakes and limitations. They will find the encouragement and support that will assist them in responding to the Lord’s call to grow in holiness and perfection.
Our love for God must be reflected in the genuine and pure love we have for ourselves and one another. This love is only possible with God’s grace, for which we must pray daily. This love is patient and kind. This love never fails!
Most Reverend Michael F. Burbidge