Finding Easter Hope in Trying Times
How are NC Catholics coping with the recession?
By Rich Reece
As this issue of NC Catholics went to press, unemployment in North Carolina had risen to 9.7%, third highest in the U.S. In this season of joy, when the Church observes Christ’s saving victory over death, many are experiencing a “little death,” the bewilderment and pain that follow job loss. NC Catholics spoke with three people -- an executive who lost his job after almost 30 years; a Regional Director of Catholic Charities; and a priest of the Diocese -- to gain some personal, practical and spiritual perspective on the situation and to point out sources of help and hope for the unemployed faithful.
Tom
“I guess I went through all the stages of grief. Even now, though, if I think about it too much, all the bad feelings come back: shame, fear, worthlessness.”
The speaker is Tom (not his real name), a resident of Raleigh and a parishioner at Sacred Heart Cathedral. Five years ago Tom was a well-paid executive with an international firm in New England. When the company was sold, the new owners expressed confidence in his performance. Months later, he was let go and replaced with someone from the buyer’s company.
“I came to work on a Monday, was called into a meeting at 8:15 and given the news. They told me to leave immediately and come back after hours to clean out my office. I remember getting home at 9 in the morning – it was a golden, warm fall day – and thinking, ‘This is so strange. It’s so beautiful and this horrible thing just happened.’”
Tom was a single father and the sole support of a son in college and a daughter in high school. When she got home from school that day he told her the news. “She was sweet,” he remembers. “She said, ‘Oh, Dad, I’m sorry.’ And I was thinking, ‘Sorry? This could be the end, for all of us!’”
Tom had worked for the same company, before its sale, for 29 years. “I didn’t have a back-up plan,” he says. “I always thought I’d retire from there. Now I was only in my 50s, and still had dependents.” Gradually, he faced the fact that he would need to look for work, and soon. The search would take almost exactly a year. On the first anniversary of his layoff, he interviewed for the job he now holds in Raleigh.
He still remembers vividly that year of joblessness, though: “The first thing was this feeling of separateness from the rest of the world. I’d drive to the bank to deposit my unemployment check, and it seemed like everyone else on the road had a ‘real’ place to go. And I was ashamed: I’d always been proud – too proud, I realized now – of being the provider. My identity was, ‘I do important work and I’m a good father.’ Now I clearly was no longer working, and what kind of father, I thought, can’t support his children materially?”
At the same time, Tom recalls, his feelings of helplessness reinforced his sense of dependence on God. “I’m afraid I was like a lot of people. When I was riding high, I got in the habit of thinking I was the one in control. When I fell off my horse, I remembered that whatever abilities or success I’d had were from the Lord. When I finally was offered a new job, I actually wondered whether I could do it. My self-confidence after a year of unemployment and several rejections by potential employers was very low. But I realized that self-confidence was missing the point. I could trust God to love me and to help me through difficulties. I didn’t need to be afraid.”
The Social Worker
Tom’s ordeal unfolded before the current economic downturn. Now Betty Byrnes, Director of the Tar River Regional Office of Catholic Charities, in Greenville, is seeing a sharp increase in the number of people like him, people who have never been unemployed before. “They are terribly lost,” she says. “I see desperation, panic, embarrassment. We’re here to say there is help; you only need to ask for it. And we’ll show you how.”
Catholic Charities provides a variety of assistance to these individuals and their families. Known collectively as Family Support Services, the assistance begins with an assessment of mental health issues, such as depression. The agency looks next at basic material needs impacted by the layoff – food, clothing, utilities.
Family relationships are also given attention. “The tension and uncertainty following job loss can affect marriages and children,” Betty Byrnes says. “Even when the adults try to protect the children, we see grades dropping, kids becoming withdrawn. They may not understand why a parent is cranky or uncommunicative, but they feel it. So one thing we stress is the importance of communication within the family.
“Another important thing for people in this situation is to take good physical care of themselves. When there’s no income, the temptation is to eat poorly, avoid the doctor or the therapist; some people begin drinking too much or ignoring symptoms of depression.”
Another component of Family Support Services is education. “Unlike people who have gone through many episodes of unemployment, these individuals are unaware of all the avenues of help that are available, and how to access them,” explains Betty Byrnes. “We have that information, and we can teach people about resources for receiving government assistance, finding health insurance and seeking new employment.”
As if their situation isn’t difficult enough, people suddenly without jobs need to be aware of predators and scam artists. “A common feeling among people who have been laid off is panic,” Betty Byrnes says. “So they’re vulnerable to someone who will say, for instance, ‘We’ll talk to your creditors and get your debt reduced, for a fee.’ We tell people never to pay money up front for one of these services. Legitimate agencies don’t operate that way. If you have doubts, call the Attorney General’s office or the Better Business Bureau.”
Betty Byrnes says that Family Support Services have been shown to be effective both in shortening the time between job loss and re-employment, and in helping the individuals and their families to function more healthily than they did even before losing their jobs.
The Priest
Father Dan Oschwald, Pastor of St. Mark Catholic Church in Wilmington, says his parishioners have felt the recession keenly. As a pastor, he’s seen firsthand the sad effects of “losing the dignity that work brings.” He’s also noticed an upturn in Mass attendance. “I see people becoming more humble because of economic troubles,” he says. “They are not constantly buying things, but learning to live more simply, and to recognize their need for God.”
What comfort is there for someone whose livelihood is suddenly gone? “God has a plan,” Father Dan says. “We can trust Him to provide for us. In our parish, people have also become more aware of their spiritual family, receiving help and encouragement from their neighbors. And those who are giving benefit as well.”
As painful as losing a job can be, Father Dan believes it can be a spiritual opportunity. “Anything that puts someone on their knees,” he says, “can bring them closer to the Lord. We saw a huge resurgence of religious interest and participation following 9/11, but sadly it faded before a year had passed. I hope the lessons of these current difficult times will stay with people. I hope they’ll learn to see God not as a Fixer of problems but a Sustainer of life.”
Don’t Know Where to Turn?
Catholic Charities’ Family Support Services can assist or direct you to assistance with all the difficulties that follow job loss. All programs are available to individuals and families regardless of race, creed, religion, ability to pay. Go to the Catholic Charities Web site for contact information or call the Raleigh Office of Catholic Charities at 919-790-8533 for information about the Regional Office nearest you.
Job Connections at St. Francis
In January St. Francis of Assisi Parish in Raleigh initiated Job Connections, a ministry to encourage and support men and women while they are in between jobs. The ministry provides encouragement, information, networking, spiritual guidance, and job search skills training in a Catholic-Christian setting.
At bi-weekly meetings (the 2nd and 4th Wednesdays of the month from 8:30 - 10:30am), professionally-trained volunteer coordinators and volunteer speakers provide answers to questions concerning the job search. Participants can discuss their own needs face-to-face with experts. The atmosphere is friendly and supportive - one where participants can explore employment and career possibilities with guidance from coordinators trained to help people sharpen their job-seeking skills.
For more information call Bill Clark at 919-528-4473 or Ed Miscovic at 919-841-0246.
Trust in God
Know that the Lord works wonders for the faithful; the Lord hears when I call out…
Many say, “May we see better times! Lord, show us the light of Your face!”
But You have given my heart more joy than they have when grain and wine abound.
In peace I shall both lie down and sleep, for You alone, Lord, make me secure.
Psalms 4: 4, 7-9.